Years and years ago, I was forced to watch a video about defensive driving for my license. While trapped there for hours, a much older man tried to chat me up. He was persistent in his pursuit; I was persistent in my rejection. We were at a draw.
Until I put down my trump card.
“Do you know Jesus?” I asked.
“Can I get to know him through you?”
Now at this point, I was rolling my eyes. But I wanted to do two things: earnestly share the gospel, and get this man away from me. I did what any other sensible woman would do:
I told him a lot about Jesus, and then gave him the number of my church, along with days and times of service.
He left me alone after that.
Most people have had to deal with unwanted romantic attention. Sometimes it’s good to have a few weapons in your arsenal to help discourage that person. Here are some of mine:
1. “My Daddy still pays all of my bills, and he bought my siblings really nice cars, so you need to buy me a Range Rover as soon as we are married.”
This nightmarish sentence scares almost every man I know, including the ones who repeatedly tell me that they are interested in me. This only works in relationships; men on the street are likely to promise you anything to get your phone number.
2. Pretend to take them seriously.
If a man starts promising me all sorts of things, like jewelry, high end shoes, cars, or my own McMansion, I really get into the act. I act like I believe him. I come up with a timeline, and make it clear I expect him to deliver every little thing he ever promised me. For men who tell me they want to get married, I tell them I could see myself getting married in 6 months time, and because my biological clock is ticking, we should start working on that baby IMMEDIATELY after the wedding.
Conversation shut down.
3. For men who approach me and are too persistent, I WITNESS to them. They need Jesus! They NEED to hear about Jesus. Right now. They need to hear my testimony. I can start a theological debate with just about anybody. I will give them my own Bible if they need it. I can pray for them right then and there. In fact, I offer to meet with them for Bible Study.
Funny, none of them have ever taken me up on that offer.
4. Act high maintenance.
I am slightly high maintenance, but I ramp it up if I suspect a man might be a cheapskate. I name drop countries I like to visit and restaurants I love to go to on a regular basis, and all of the designer bags + shoes I plan on making some lucky man get for me. Oooh, and my favorite types of houses. I also mention all of the times I pop in and out of real estate agents’ offices in the U.K. and the U.S., because I want to buy property really soon, and it would be WONDERFUL if my future husband could buy me my dream house.
5. Act like you’re a part of his future…in the first month.
Now, I’ve never tried this one, but one of my guy friends told me it happened to him. He was thinking about moving, and a girl he had dated for 2 weeks started to act like she was going to move and live with him. It didn’t take too much longer for him to end things with her.
Full disclosure: I don’t necessarily like scaring men away; most of the men I know have been absolute gentlemen. I happen to be a commitment phobic person, so I have at times used these tactics inappropriately to get out of a relationship when I felt like it was progressing way too quickly. I’m working on my issues so I don’t feel compelled to scare anybody away.
But if you ever get a creeper, try one of those tried and true strategies for scaring a man away. After all, some people are best loved from a distance.
see, these girls know exactly what i mean.